28 September 2018

from the Politics page of the CapTimes-SevenLakesRealNews
(October 1, 2052)

THIS CONTENT IS SPONSORED BY KAVANAUGH: THE KING OF BEERS

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This year's Senate election has been dominated by the issue of cosmology.  Mera Kohl is a longtime supporter of the heliocentric solar system theory.  But Ron Johnson-Necropotence argues that our Earth is the clear center of the starry spheres.

"Make no mistake about it," Johnson-Necropotence said through a spokesminion last week.  "I just celebrated my tenth undeathday and believe me, I know a thing or two about the secrets of the universe.  Mera Kohl and her thirty-something elitist friends don't think you can handle the truth.  What she calls a 'star,' our Sun, is a cushy and fuzzy ball of goldenrod twine that has always moved in the fifth circle of the heavens

What's more, we need to be investing in exploration of the Hollow Earth Civilizations, which were known to have flourished in the 19th century, so that we can add stonemilk to our energy mix."







17 September 2018


I am confident Ms. Ocasio-Cortez has all the knowledge of the South China Sea that she needs to be an effective Congresswoman:  namely, that it is a sea that is getting warmer and rising.



04 September 2018

Cherry-picked Political Statistic of the Week 

In the states of:  Oregon, Idaho, Colorado, Montana, South Dakota, Nebraska, Kansas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Louisiana, Mississippi, Iowa, and Wisconsin (comprising 54 districts, and 50 Republican candidates*) -- a pretty swath of the country, if I do say so, there are exactly ZERO women running for the US House as Republicans.  (I made this determination simply based on reading first names, although I did have to look up Rep. French Hill of Arkansas to be sure.  Gad, what a grifter.)


*The four districts abandoned by Republicans are Oregon 3rd (Portland), Wisconsin 2nd (Madison area), Mississippi 2nd, and Louisiana 2nd (New Orleans).